Gender, sexuality & new haircut

I have been thinking more than usual lately. I have been thinking about my gender. I have been thinking about my sexuality. And I have been thinking about getting a haircut. So let’s look through these thoughts, starting with sexuality:

I have for some reason been thinking about my sexuality lately. ¨Am I gay?¨ is a thought that has run through my head many times at the most random moments. After thorough concidering, I have come to the conclusion that I am not gay. Because I am not really attracted to girls. Not mostly at least. If anything I am bisexual, but not gay. So either straight or bi. But does it really matter to me right now? No, it does not; because I am not interested in a relationship or any love stuff or anything at the moment. I am happy by myself, I have great friends, and that is all I need at the time.

Okay, let’s talk about gender. Now, this is something I am more insecure about than my sexuality. But I feel like I’ve come to a decent conclusion for myself: I am a girl, but I am also kind of a little boy. I do not want boy parts and I do not wish I was a boy (well, I do sometimes, but I do not want to actually change into a boy…). However I feel like dressing ¨like a boy¨ pretty often, and I am going to cut my hair short (which I will write about after this). the reason why I wrote ¨like a boy¨ with those dot things (don’t know the word for them), is because I think everyone should be able to dress they want to. Although people may connect that type of clothes with boys, there shouldn’t be anything wrong with girls dressing that way as well. So, I am a girl, but I want to dress excactly the way I want to without others questioning it.

Alright, my haircut! Next week I am going to cut my hair. I have really long hair at the moment, and I am tired of it. It doesn’t feel like me, I want it to change. So I’m going short. Pixie cut short. And I am so excited! I can barely wait! I really hope I will feel like my true self after this. Using hair gel and stuff (like boys do, yes) and, well, just having short hair, it sounds so lovely. It almost feels like I have already cut my hair!

How about you? Do you define your gender differently from your sex? What is your sexuality? Let me know in the comments, I want to have a conversation with you here.

Bye guys,

Stay happy, stay awkward :3


5 thoughts on “Gender, sexuality & new haircut

  1. The butch January 17, 2016 / 4:14 pm

    Go for the chop! I love my short butch cut.

    I came out as bi in my late teens. That was a million years ago. And I am still bi forty+ years later. But there are many different aspects to my gender and my sexuality. Both have been fluid over the years, and it has been challenging at times. At the moment, I define myself as a bisexual queer butch woman, but there are large chunks of time when I am bigendered, which puts me under the trans umbrella.

    • awkwardgirl99 January 17, 2016 / 6:54 pm

      Thanks for sharing your experience about this, I recognize the feeling about the fluidness (is that a word..?) 😀 I am really looking forward to getting my hair cut, if only I can figure out what style I want… o.O

      • The butch January 17, 2016 / 7:02 pm

        Fluidity is the word.

        Coincidentally, I recently posted about my “lesbian butch haircut” and included a poster image of various styles.

  2. Jason Nico January 16, 2016 / 12:55 am

    First, good luck with your haircut! Then to answer your question, I feel ya! Biologically speaking I’m female but I choose to identify differently because I find that I often fluctuate between what is considered “male” and “female”. Some days I look like and come across as a girl, on others as a guy and sometimes I’m in that happy medium. It’s difficult to explain to others but I’m glad to see I’m not the only one!

    • awkwardgirl99 January 16, 2016 / 8:47 am

      Thank’s! I’m also glad to hear I’m not the only one 😀

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