I have been thinking more than usual lately. I have been thinking about my gender. I have been thinking about my sexuality. And I have been thinking about getting a haircut. So let’s look through these thoughts, starting with sexuality:
I have for some reason been thinking about my sexuality lately. ¨Am I gay?¨ is a thought that has run through my head many times at the most random moments. After thorough concidering, I have come to the conclusion that I am not gay. Because I am not really attracted to girls. Not mostly at least. If anything I am bisexual, but not gay. So either straight or bi. But does it really matter to me right now? No, it does not; because I am not interested in a relationship or any love stuff or anything at the moment. I am happy by myself, I have great friends, and that is all I need at the time.
Okay, let’s talk about gender. Now, this is something I am more insecure about than my sexuality. But I feel like I’ve come to a decent conclusion for myself: I am a girl, but I am also kind of a little boy. I do not want boy parts and I do not wish I was a boy (well, I do sometimes, but I do not want to actually change into a boy…). However I feel like dressing ¨like a boy¨ pretty often, and I am going to cut my hair short (which I will write about after this). the reason why I wrote ¨like a boy¨ with those dot things (don’t know the word for them), is because I think everyone should be able to dress they want to. Although people may connect that type of clothes with boys, there shouldn’t be anything wrong with girls dressing that way as well. So, I am a girl, but I want to dress excactly the way I want to without others questioning it.
Alright, my haircut! Next week I am going to cut my hair. I have really long hair at the moment, and I am tired of it. It doesn’t feel like me, I want it to change. So I’m going short. Pixie cut short. And I am so excited! I can barely wait! I really hope I will feel like my true self after this. Using hair gel and stuff (like boys do, yes) and, well, just having short hair, it sounds so lovely. It almost feels like I have already cut my hair!
How about you? Do you define your gender differently from your sex? What is your sexuality? Let me know in the comments, I want to have a conversation with you here.
Stay happy, stay awkward :3