Stop. Stop crying. I’m crying again. However this time with good reason. I wasn’t wrong yesterday. I felt like something was wrong, and it was. And it is.
I don’t want to think about it. I don’t want it to be true. I want him to feel the same as I do.
He feels better when not being around technology so much. He feels better when being around people. In real life. So I get it, a long-distance relationship doesn’t work for him. I can’t do anything but respect that. I once wrote on a post-it note that, for me to leave him, he would have to ask me to. And today, he did just that.
Of course, he didn’t say it like that. He just made it clear that he didn’t think it is going to work out. If it was up to me, it would work out, even if we didn’t speak for weeks, it would work out as long as we just got to talk sometimes. But he can’t help it for not feeling the same way. Different people have different needs, and there is only so much one can take.
I’m glad he’s feeling better, though. I hope it continues that way. I wish for only bright days for him. I love him. So I’ll do as he wishes.
Don’t think I’m trying to make him seem like a bad guy, okay? He is the kindest person I’ve ever met. He is amazing in so many ways, and I’ve never felt so safe with anyone ever before. I wish for all the best for him. And at this point, the best for him is to be around people, reading books, things that don’t include technology. Of course I am upset, but there is nothing I can do about it. As I said in a post not long ago: At the end of the day, it is up to him.
So I hope your day is good, guys…
Stay happy, stay awkward